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Isn't it amazing? It only took me 2 days to know that I was in the wrong place. Yet, 2 weeks passed by, then 2 months, then 4 months, then 7 months, and still counting... Something came along at the 2nd month though, and I rejected it after thinking through...
Isn't it the same as being in a stinking toilet? The very first moment I stepped in, I pinched my nose and complained that it stinks. After 5 mins, the nose got used to it, and the toilet did not seem to smell that bad anymore. Perhaps in an hour, I would have forgotten that I was in a dirty and smelly toilet?
Yet, I am constantly reminded that I am in a toilet, a stinking one some more. It is hard to get used to the stench, cos as I walked around the toilet, I found more dirt and more shit. However, I am also accepting that discovering more shit is normal in this toilet...
Yet again, months can fly past just like that if I look at it another way. Close an eye, and soon it will be 12 months, 15 months, 24 months...? Just be easy with it, and all will just be easy. Time can be kind in this instance?
It is akin to running... As the run progresses, the breathing gets heavier, the sweat is like water, the face starts to turn 'green', legs start wanting to give way.. Thought of stopping flashes, questions of why I am putting myself up for all these pop up all over the place.
Yet, I just want to cross the finishing line... thus endurance comes into play. "Endure. You can do it. Just keep going. Reaching soon. Just a little bit more only...Keep moving...” The chant will be replayed over and over again in my head when the going gets tough, psychoing myself to keep going... till I see the finishing point.. And when I cross it, the feelings of triumph and relief set in.
Sometimes, I wonder that spirit of mine is constantly used on the wrong people, places, situations and times.
There is a reason why I am here, and why I am still here... For the time being, it is still the best choice, so I cannot and should not grumble that much. People always make the best choice at any point in time, isn't it? Sometimes, I hate it cos I know that too clearly...
Let's test where my limit is again, see what unexpected will happen along the way, and how the whole experience will affect me going forward.
Isn't it the same as being in a stinking toilet? The very first moment I stepped in, I pinched my nose and complained that it stinks. After 5 mins, the nose got used to it, and the toilet did not seem to smell that bad anymore. Perhaps in an hour, I would have forgotten that I was in a dirty and smelly toilet?
Yet, I am constantly reminded that I am in a toilet, a stinking one some more. It is hard to get used to the stench, cos as I walked around the toilet, I found more dirt and more shit. However, I am also accepting that discovering more shit is normal in this toilet...
Yet again, months can fly past just like that if I look at it another way. Close an eye, and soon it will be 12 months, 15 months, 24 months...? Just be easy with it, and all will just be easy. Time can be kind in this instance?
It is akin to running... As the run progresses, the breathing gets heavier, the sweat is like water, the face starts to turn 'green', legs start wanting to give way.. Thought of stopping flashes, questions of why I am putting myself up for all these pop up all over the place.
Yet, I just want to cross the finishing line... thus endurance comes into play. "Endure. You can do it. Just keep going. Reaching soon. Just a little bit more only...Keep moving...” The chant will be replayed over and over again in my head when the going gets tough, psychoing myself to keep going... till I see the finishing point.. And when I cross it, the feelings of triumph and relief set in.
Sometimes, I wonder that spirit of mine is constantly used on the wrong people, places, situations and times.
There is a reason why I am here, and why I am still here... For the time being, it is still the best choice, so I cannot and should not grumble that much. People always make the best choice at any point in time, isn't it? Sometimes, I hate it cos I know that too clearly...
Let's test where my limit is again, see what unexpected will happen along the way, and how the whole experience will affect me going forward.
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