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Warm tears
Trickling down the face
Sadness and hurt
They may represent
Or lost, fear & vulnerability
They just are
At times like these
Lend me your shoulder
Give me a hug
Stick close to me
All I want is reassurance
That all will be fine
Yet moments of these
A total submission to my emotions
Are hardly known to others
Hiding in a corner to cry
Has long been my style
Perhaps it is about pride and me
An image of strength that I portray
Or it is a conversation
Of not wanting to be a nuisance
Taking up someone else’s time
All reasons that can be
Does it matter?
Maybe not
Just let the tears drop anyway
Let them wash away
All that is there
When it is time
I’ll wipe them dry
And walk out brave
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Monday, August 28, 2006
Leaving...
During these 1 - 2 weeks, I am going to witness colleagues that I am close to leaving this company for greener pastures out there.
Guess I can't help but feel pretty blue. No matter what, we have shared so much during the times they are here…
J - She is such a good working colleague and friend. We have weathered through many things in work together. If without her, I wonder how I would struggle in my dept and how long I can last here. Sitting just next to me, we are 2 "monsters" and "gangsters", talking the loudest in the whole of level 6. Atrocious is the word? Ha ha. We bitch about things that we can't stand, laugh out loud at jokes, and share ideas in depth. She has been a fantastic thinker in creativity and marketing ideas, thus able to point out certain things in work that I miss out. We complement each other where work is related. We are similar in some senses in personalities and thus are able to share personal things heart to heart. We talk about what matter, discuss about how things should be done, exchange point of views and share our feelings. Times with her here is fun, enjoyable and sweet.
A - With this man, it is quite strange. We were pretty distant though he was sitting very near me at a point in time. We become closer to each other only when we start going out for lunches and communicate over msn. He is a serious man, taking his work with so much pride. (So dumb, isn't he? Ha!) He is very helpful, rendering his services to and sharing his knowledge with colleagues if he could. He has been nice in his own ways too, like giving me a surprise last year during my birthday and has been around to offer me advices, tips and helps in whatever ways he could. Though he isn't a feeling type of man (typical man?!), I know that he is a loyal and good friend to have. I know I can turn to him if I am ever in trouble and need his helps.
M - He is one of his kinds, seriously. On the outside, he seems such a cool and friendly man, hitting off instanteously with almost everyone he sees. Yet, on the inside, he is such a gentle, loving and sensitive man. The whole ball game was changed the moment he appeared outside my ward in the hospital last year. I guessed I was pretty touched by his sudden appearance then. He needed not be there at all, but he did - turning up one late night, catching me by surprise. I do not know exactly when it happened, but somehow we have drawn closer to each other by the days. He is there to support when I am feeling down; he is there to listen when I grumble and complain about things; he is there to offer different point of views when I am getting fixated. At other times, he is just simply around, which is more than enough. For everything that he is, how I wish I could have done more for him and make a difference in his life.
Maybe things can never be the same again when each of them goes their separate ways. As much as I am sad that they have to go, I know deep inside that I should feel happy and excited for them taking this big step. The world out there is certainly an adventure, offering more opportunities and choices for them. I do sincerely wish them all the best in whatever they are going to do...
Guess I can't help but feel pretty blue. No matter what, we have shared so much during the times they are here…
J - She is such a good working colleague and friend. We have weathered through many things in work together. If without her, I wonder how I would struggle in my dept and how long I can last here. Sitting just next to me, we are 2 "monsters" and "gangsters", talking the loudest in the whole of level 6. Atrocious is the word? Ha ha. We bitch about things that we can't stand, laugh out loud at jokes, and share ideas in depth. She has been a fantastic thinker in creativity and marketing ideas, thus able to point out certain things in work that I miss out. We complement each other where work is related. We are similar in some senses in personalities and thus are able to share personal things heart to heart. We talk about what matter, discuss about how things should be done, exchange point of views and share our feelings. Times with her here is fun, enjoyable and sweet.
A - With this man, it is quite strange. We were pretty distant though he was sitting very near me at a point in time. We become closer to each other only when we start going out for lunches and communicate over msn. He is a serious man, taking his work with so much pride. (So dumb, isn't he? Ha!) He is very helpful, rendering his services to and sharing his knowledge with colleagues if he could. He has been nice in his own ways too, like giving me a surprise last year during my birthday and has been around to offer me advices, tips and helps in whatever ways he could. Though he isn't a feeling type of man (typical man?!), I know that he is a loyal and good friend to have. I know I can turn to him if I am ever in trouble and need his helps.
M - He is one of his kinds, seriously. On the outside, he seems such a cool and friendly man, hitting off instanteously with almost everyone he sees. Yet, on the inside, he is such a gentle, loving and sensitive man. The whole ball game was changed the moment he appeared outside my ward in the hospital last year. I guessed I was pretty touched by his sudden appearance then. He needed not be there at all, but he did - turning up one late night, catching me by surprise. I do not know exactly when it happened, but somehow we have drawn closer to each other by the days. He is there to support when I am feeling down; he is there to listen when I grumble and complain about things; he is there to offer different point of views when I am getting fixated. At other times, he is just simply around, which is more than enough. For everything that he is, how I wish I could have done more for him and make a difference in his life.
Maybe things can never be the same again when each of them goes their separate ways. As much as I am sad that they have to go, I know deep inside that I should feel happy and excited for them taking this big step. The world out there is certainly an adventure, offering more opportunities and choices for them. I do sincerely wish them all the best in whatever they are going to do...
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
简单
若这世界只有黑与白
一切是不是会变的更简单
喜欢与否 爱与恨
情与愁 对与错
都将格外分明
想多么简单 就多么简单
没有也许 没有可能
没有纳闷 没有疑惑
不再有 距离与惋惜
不必有所顾虑 不必拐弯摸角
不必吞吞吐吐 不必躲躲闪闪
不必互相猜疑 不必遗憾终生
一切的思绪与情感
有如水晶一般 清澈透明
你和我之间 也不再隔着一道界线
倘若真的如此 该有多完美啊
一切是不是会变的更简单
喜欢与否 爱与恨
情与愁 对与错
都将格外分明
想多么简单 就多么简单
没有也许 没有可能
没有纳闷 没有疑惑
不再有 距离与惋惜
不必有所顾虑 不必拐弯摸角
不必吞吞吐吐 不必躲躲闪闪
不必互相猜疑 不必遗憾终生
一切的思绪与情感
有如水晶一般 清澈透明
你和我之间 也不再隔着一道界线
倘若真的如此 该有多完美啊
Sunday, August 20, 2006
With Love...
Forgot how it started
Dunno when it was
But you were there
On a silent late night
Songs from Emi Fujita
Thoughts are you
If time can be a standstill
Moments shared wish to be eternity
Memories need not be
From a distance
Wish upon a shooting star
For happiness to be yours always
With love...
Dunno when it was
But you were there
On a silent late night
Songs from Emi Fujita
Thoughts are you
If time can be a standstill
Moments shared wish to be eternity
Memories need not be
From a distance
Wish upon a shooting star
For happiness to be yours always
With love...
Friday, August 18, 2006
I Surrender!
Finally took the courage and threw in my white towel - I tendered my resignation.
Was it an easy decision?
Well, there is always Fear that will hold me back in trying something new. There is this thing called the Unknown, and that can be pretty scary, as I cannot see where I may be heading, whether I can make it or not. It can be a bad decision; it can be a wrong move; it can be that I am too impatient… Will I perform in a new job? Can I fit in the culture? Is the new job something that I really want? Can it lead me to where I want to go? The list of considerations goes on. And especially when I'm comfortable in this company, the risks and the prices to pay may just be so high.
At the same time, it is not as if that I am not doing well in this company. I am due for a transfer to head another department soon and I have just been promoted. I have given opportunities here and have risen in ranks from executive to asst manager to manager now in my 2+years here. So it does seem like that I am doing good here, and is a so-called 'performer'. So some will think that it is ultimate madness that I am making this move at this point in time.
On the flip side, I am concerned about my own growth here. I know that I can put in 30% of my efforts and still achieve the results that are needed here. By being so comfortable here, is that beneficial to myself? Am I still learning and growing? Am I achieving what I potentially able to? Is my work here aligned with my career direction? At the same time, I seem to lose my motivation – I no longer have that strong a drive as before. Is it because I accept the ways things work here or that I cannot be bothered anymore?
At the same time, I am pissed off by the empty promises that were given to me. Though it seems like I am doing well here, in my own point of view, I feel that I am not properly appreciated and compensated for my contributions here. In our recent appraisal, my boss said she felt that I am not committed enough and she did not know whether it is because it is the dept that I am in where ownership is tough. I asked her "What makes commitment?" Her reply is along the line of hardworking and staying back to work late. Is that called COMMITMENT? To me, commitment means a conscious effort to put forth best efforts in what I am doing, and achieve the best results that I could. It got nothing to do with overtime and craps like that…that may just mean inefficiency.
So there I have it, all the internal debates and struggles about to leave or not to leave. In the end, "listen to your heart and gut feel" struck a cord. So I did what I did...
How things will eventually turn out, I do not know. Will I regret it? Is it a good move? I will only know the answers on hindsight. And well, even if I fail, at least I learn from it and be better at next attempt, wun I?
Was it an easy decision?
Well, there is always Fear that will hold me back in trying something new. There is this thing called the Unknown, and that can be pretty scary, as I cannot see where I may be heading, whether I can make it or not. It can be a bad decision; it can be a wrong move; it can be that I am too impatient… Will I perform in a new job? Can I fit in the culture? Is the new job something that I really want? Can it lead me to where I want to go? The list of considerations goes on. And especially when I'm comfortable in this company, the risks and the prices to pay may just be so high.
At the same time, it is not as if that I am not doing well in this company. I am due for a transfer to head another department soon and I have just been promoted. I have given opportunities here and have risen in ranks from executive to asst manager to manager now in my 2+years here. So it does seem like that I am doing good here, and is a so-called 'performer'. So some will think that it is ultimate madness that I am making this move at this point in time.
On the flip side, I am concerned about my own growth here. I know that I can put in 30% of my efforts and still achieve the results that are needed here. By being so comfortable here, is that beneficial to myself? Am I still learning and growing? Am I achieving what I potentially able to? Is my work here aligned with my career direction? At the same time, I seem to lose my motivation – I no longer have that strong a drive as before. Is it because I accept the ways things work here or that I cannot be bothered anymore?
At the same time, I am pissed off by the empty promises that were given to me. Though it seems like I am doing well here, in my own point of view, I feel that I am not properly appreciated and compensated for my contributions here. In our recent appraisal, my boss said she felt that I am not committed enough and she did not know whether it is because it is the dept that I am in where ownership is tough. I asked her "What makes commitment?" Her reply is along the line of hardworking and staying back to work late. Is that called COMMITMENT? To me, commitment means a conscious effort to put forth best efforts in what I am doing, and achieve the best results that I could. It got nothing to do with overtime and craps like that…that may just mean inefficiency.
So there I have it, all the internal debates and struggles about to leave or not to leave. In the end, "listen to your heart and gut feel" struck a cord. So I did what I did...
How things will eventually turn out, I do not know. Will I regret it? Is it a good move? I will only know the answers on hindsight. And well, even if I fail, at least I learn from it and be better at next attempt, wun I?
Wish me luck...
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Bond between Man and Animal
Was watching Animal Planet channel on SCV past midnight yesterday and refused to sleep without finishing the show that I was watching. :P
The program was showing the relationship between a Japanese zookeeper, Ashihito ( Hope I got his name rite! :P) and his white polar bear, Peace in Japan. This very passionate and loving man was tasked to take care of the baby polar bear back in 2000.
He worried about Peace like his own daughter. When she was a cub, he was worried about Peace’s weight, finding the right milk formula for her and feeding her. When Peace was 8 months old, he was trying all means to teach her to get into water so that she could keep herself cool during the hot summer. He knew that polar bears are more prone to stress than any other animals and may fall sick due to that, thus he showered Peace with lotsa love, attention and care eversince she was a baby.
Yet, when Peace was coming to 3, Ashihito's superiors disallowed him to have close contacts with Peace anymore, as she can be potentially dangerous to a human being. He was devastated. However, that did not stop him - he still cared for Peace constantly, standing outside her cage to establish the bonding with her every day. When she had unexplained convulsions at age 3+ years, he voluntarily stayed back late at work everyday to care for her too. That showed how deep his love is for Peace.
He said, “Peace may has changed in size, but her eyes never change. They are so gentle. At least to me, they are." He also made a statement something along the line of "even if we cannot understand the animals totally, we still try to care for them in their best interests..." and he is always thinking about how best he can care for Peace, and what is next for her.
The strong bonding and deep trust between the foster father and Peace can never be erased or replaced. Ashihito's eyes were filled with love and warmth whenever he looked at Peace….
The program was showing the relationship between a Japanese zookeeper, Ashihito ( Hope I got his name rite! :P) and his white polar bear, Peace in Japan. This very passionate and loving man was tasked to take care of the baby polar bear back in 2000.
He worried about Peace like his own daughter. When she was a cub, he was worried about Peace’s weight, finding the right milk formula for her and feeding her. When Peace was 8 months old, he was trying all means to teach her to get into water so that she could keep herself cool during the hot summer. He knew that polar bears are more prone to stress than any other animals and may fall sick due to that, thus he showered Peace with lotsa love, attention and care eversince she was a baby.
Yet, when Peace was coming to 3, Ashihito's superiors disallowed him to have close contacts with Peace anymore, as she can be potentially dangerous to a human being. He was devastated. However, that did not stop him - he still cared for Peace constantly, standing outside her cage to establish the bonding with her every day. When she had unexplained convulsions at age 3+ years, he voluntarily stayed back late at work everyday to care for her too. That showed how deep his love is for Peace.
He said, “Peace may has changed in size, but her eyes never change. They are so gentle. At least to me, they are." He also made a statement something along the line of "even if we cannot understand the animals totally, we still try to care for them in their best interests..." and he is always thinking about how best he can care for Peace, and what is next for her.
The strong bonding and deep trust between the foster father and Peace can never be erased or replaced. Ashihito's eyes were filled with love and warmth whenever he looked at Peace….
Well, rattling so much about the devoted Ashihito, and the white polar bear... I am, for a reason or another, just simply very touched by the deep love, affection, care, trust and bonding that were very strongly brought up in this animal - human relationship. So touched that tears could unknowingly start to swell in my eyes while watching this show. Sometimes I am also amazed how much I can feel for something. Perhaps it is because we are talking about an animal here…
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
A Weakness of Mine
Realised a weakness of mine during a conversation with someone close.
Suddenly came into recognition that I find it hard to walk out of situations or people, especially when I feel that I got obligations towards them. It is tough for me to just disregard everything and walk out of a situation that I know that I should. Obligations of all sorts come into considerations, and decisions become hard to make. What is it exactly that holds me back in situations like these? Is it a tussle between the heart and the brain or is it the devil and angel in me playing up? Is it about caring too much about others, or about "responsibility", or about what is "right and wrong"?? Or it is just me, simply emotionally weak and soft, thus not being able to put down my feet and just do it?
Many a times, I rather it is others that walk out of my life or make me upset, not the other way round. At least, it is easier for me to handle my own hurt and sadness, than to know someone out there is depressed because of me. Reason is simple – if it is the other person, I may be helpless, not knowing how to make it better for him or her.
Of course, it is not often that I may be caught in such situations. Maybe I only find it tougher when I feel that I am treated well, and thus got a duty so called to 'repay' all the kindness, given opportunities, love etc…
However, I do end up doing what I need to eventually. Bite the bullet of pain and just do it, for the better of everyone or for myself. Best medicine is always bitter, isn’t it? Just that the process of getting there is made much tougher by my own considerations.
In situations like these, is there an easier and better way for me to get to the end point? There should be, ya? Perhaps I would wait for someone to show me the way to it?!
Suddenly came into recognition that I find it hard to walk out of situations or people, especially when I feel that I got obligations towards them. It is tough for me to just disregard everything and walk out of a situation that I know that I should. Obligations of all sorts come into considerations, and decisions become hard to make. What is it exactly that holds me back in situations like these? Is it a tussle between the heart and the brain or is it the devil and angel in me playing up? Is it about caring too much about others, or about "responsibility", or about what is "right and wrong"?? Or it is just me, simply emotionally weak and soft, thus not being able to put down my feet and just do it?
Many a times, I rather it is others that walk out of my life or make me upset, not the other way round. At least, it is easier for me to handle my own hurt and sadness, than to know someone out there is depressed because of me. Reason is simple – if it is the other person, I may be helpless, not knowing how to make it better for him or her.
Of course, it is not often that I may be caught in such situations. Maybe I only find it tougher when I feel that I am treated well, and thus got a duty so called to 'repay' all the kindness, given opportunities, love etc…
However, I do end up doing what I need to eventually. Bite the bullet of pain and just do it, for the better of everyone or for myself. Best medicine is always bitter, isn’t it? Just that the process of getting there is made much tougher by my own considerations.
In situations like these, is there an easier and better way for me to get to the end point? There should be, ya? Perhaps I would wait for someone to show me the way to it?!
Friday, August 11, 2006
Another quote
Saw this para...
“恋物, 从来就不是因为一个物, 而是物后面充满笑与泪的情愫。”
How true... though it is just a liner..
“恋物, 从来就不是因为一个物, 而是物后面充满笑与泪的情愫。”
How true... though it is just a liner..
Thursday, August 10, 2006
The Aug Full Moon
It was full moon day yesterday. I never bother about when the moon is going to be full. If I notice it, I simply notice it. Perhaps my parents will know better, since they always pray when it is 初一,十五. Ha ha… Anyway, I was outside yesterday, when the moon came into sight. Guess it is too big and bright to be missed.
Oh, I also realise that there is a unique name given to the full moon every month. This is us - for every thing that we see, we must give it a name. :-0 For August, the moon is known as Full Sturgeon Moon. It was a name given by the fishing tribes, as sturgeons (a big fish) were most readily caught during this month. It is also known as the Red Moon to some because as the Moon rises, it appears reddish through any sultry haze.
Do not know whether I am paying more attention to the moon yesterday cos it was exceptionally beautiful or because someone had highlighted that it was a full moon day. Whichever, I must admit that the moon was so perfect yesterday. The silhouette of it was so distinct. It was round to such perfection that beautiful is the word, and so big that it seems within one's reach. It is so dazzling yet not hurting to the eyes. Its brightness illuminated the whole sky. Stars just pale in comparison - it's difficult to find a star in such brightly lit sky.
This leads me to wonder how many pretty things have we missed out in our everyday life. When was the last time you stopped to smell a flower or to admire the ever-changing clouds in the sky? How about the last time that you just stood there to enjoy the breeze against your face, or just stared at the grass dancing with the winds? How about sunrise or sunset or the stars in the sky? Is it the hectic lifestyles that we have, or is it because these are always there that we no longer notice or appreciate them?
Side tracking a bit, how about the people around us? When was the last time you show appreciation for someone important in your life, like your parents, your siblings, your partner, your friends etc? Or because they are always there that you have taken them for granted?
Nothing stays constant, I guess. The deep bonding today may just fade with time. All kinds of relationships need lots of efforts to nurture and grow. Left alone, they may just wither and die. So are you going to show your love to someone close to your heart today? Are you going to express your appreciation for someone who has been with you through thick and thin? You may think you still have tomorrow to do all these. Well, you never know, isn’t it? Carpe Diem…
Oh, I also realise that there is a unique name given to the full moon every month. This is us - for every thing that we see, we must give it a name. :-0 For August, the moon is known as Full Sturgeon Moon. It was a name given by the fishing tribes, as sturgeons (a big fish) were most readily caught during this month. It is also known as the Red Moon to some because as the Moon rises, it appears reddish through any sultry haze.
Do not know whether I am paying more attention to the moon yesterday cos it was exceptionally beautiful or because someone had highlighted that it was a full moon day. Whichever, I must admit that the moon was so perfect yesterday. The silhouette of it was so distinct. It was round to such perfection that beautiful is the word, and so big that it seems within one's reach. It is so dazzling yet not hurting to the eyes. Its brightness illuminated the whole sky. Stars just pale in comparison - it's difficult to find a star in such brightly lit sky.
This leads me to wonder how many pretty things have we missed out in our everyday life. When was the last time you stopped to smell a flower or to admire the ever-changing clouds in the sky? How about the last time that you just stood there to enjoy the breeze against your face, or just stared at the grass dancing with the winds? How about sunrise or sunset or the stars in the sky? Is it the hectic lifestyles that we have, or is it because these are always there that we no longer notice or appreciate them?
Side tracking a bit, how about the people around us? When was the last time you show appreciation for someone important in your life, like your parents, your siblings, your partner, your friends etc? Or because they are always there that you have taken them for granted?
Nothing stays constant, I guess. The deep bonding today may just fade with time. All kinds of relationships need lots of efforts to nurture and grow. Left alone, they may just wither and die. So are you going to show your love to someone close to your heart today? Are you going to express your appreciation for someone who has been with you through thick and thin? You may think you still have tomorrow to do all these. Well, you never know, isn’t it? Carpe Diem…
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
An Old Friend
Caught up with a friend over lunch today. He was my first-3-months JC friend, and subsquently we did not exactly keep in contact, only catching up with each other once in a very blue moon. However, I do bump into him once in awhile outside. Such luck with him and him only... :)
This friend, he is very cute. You can hear his atrocious laughter almost 1 km away. Ok, I am exaggerating; however, seriously, his laughter is his trademark, so uniquely his. He is a fun guy to be with, full of humour, wits and jokes. He always makes you feel at ease, and your mood will somehow lighten with him around. He is a very creative guy as well. I remember that he is good at drawing, and doing art & crafts. I still have the stuff that he made for me back in JC days... Not only that, I like him for his forthrightness in how he feels and thinks about you, people and things. All in all, I personally feel that he is a very sweet guy and a very nice friend.
Such coincidence, he is now working in a media publishing company that my company has working relationship with. It was a business lunch today actually, but he tagged along anyway when he overheard his colleagues' conversation about having lunch with us.
It is great seeing him today. With him sitting across me, I could almost recall every fun moment that we shared in school back then. (It was also a kind reminder that time flies by...) He is, well, almost the same guy that I first knew. His gestures, expressions and mannerisms are still ever comical. His face shows no sign of aging. In fact, he seems to be looking better than ever. He exhibits some kind of unexplained charms that can easily sweep some girls off their feet. Maybe it is just my biased and distorted view of him. Hahaha..
This friend, he is very cute. You can hear his atrocious laughter almost 1 km away. Ok, I am exaggerating; however, seriously, his laughter is his trademark, so uniquely his. He is a fun guy to be with, full of humour, wits and jokes. He always makes you feel at ease, and your mood will somehow lighten with him around. He is a very creative guy as well. I remember that he is good at drawing, and doing art & crafts. I still have the stuff that he made for me back in JC days... Not only that, I like him for his forthrightness in how he feels and thinks about you, people and things. All in all, I personally feel that he is a very sweet guy and a very nice friend.
Such coincidence, he is now working in a media publishing company that my company has working relationship with. It was a business lunch today actually, but he tagged along anyway when he overheard his colleagues' conversation about having lunch with us.
It is great seeing him today. With him sitting across me, I could almost recall every fun moment that we shared in school back then. (It was also a kind reminder that time flies by...) He is, well, almost the same guy that I first knew. His gestures, expressions and mannerisms are still ever comical. His face shows no sign of aging. In fact, he seems to be looking better than ever. He exhibits some kind of unexplained charms that can easily sweep some girls off their feet. Maybe it is just my biased and distorted view of him. Hahaha..
Nevertheless, it was nice catching up with old times buddies like him. The sparks and chemistry with old friends are just so different. <:o)
Saturday, August 05, 2006
The Five Factor Personality Test
| Your Five Factor Personality Profile |
 Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have high conscientiousness. Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life. Most things in your life are organized and planned well. But you borderline on being a total perfectionist. Agreeableness: You have low agreeableness. Your self interest comes first, and others come later, if at all. In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted. And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently. Neuroticism: You have low neuroticism. You are very emotionally stable and mentally together. Only the greatest setbacks upset you, and you bounce back quickly. Overall, you are typically calm and relaxed - making others feel secure. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything. |
Friday, August 04, 2006
"Untitled"
Talking in riddles
Going in circles
Guessing and deciphering
Are games people play?
Authenticity and Honesty
Together with Trust
Are passé
Extinct in the era today?
Mind tough to figure
Heart hard to feel
Thots difficult to grasp
What else are there?
Maybe I'm dumb
Maybe I'm lazy
Maybe I'm tired
Or maybe I just can't get it?
Is it my expectations
Is it my impatience
Is it my lack of sensitivity
Or I simply do not know u?
Left wondering
Has it to do with you
Or miss the point I did
It is about me?
Let it be
Is that wise
Or an answer
Should I seek?
What say you?
Going in circles
Guessing and deciphering
Are games people play?
Authenticity and Honesty
Together with Trust
Are passé
Extinct in the era today?
Mind tough to figure
Heart hard to feel
Thots difficult to grasp
What else are there?
Maybe I'm dumb
Maybe I'm lazy
Maybe I'm tired
Or maybe I just can't get it?
Is it my expectations
Is it my impatience
Is it my lack of sensitivity
Or I simply do not know u?
Left wondering
Has it to do with you
Or miss the point I did
It is about me?
Let it be
Is that wise
Or an answer
Should I seek?
What say you?
Thursday, August 03, 2006
An Oldie
Was at Bugis with an ex- colleague for lunch yesterday. Then we went shopping thereafter, and in this shop I heard an oldie.. Such an old song that I almost forgot its existence.
It was sung all the way back in 1984, if I am not wrong. Somehow, somewhere, I heard this song long long time ago and liked it. I can still remember very vividly that one of my ECA friends in my JC was very sweet. She knew that my friend and I liked this song, so she went to copy the lyrics of this song very nicely on a piece of paper for us. If my memory has not failed me, I had tucked this piece of paper in my organiser then. I am sure that this piece of paper is still in that organiser, which is, yes, still with me today.
And with a stroke of luck again, one of my colleagues had this song. So I took the song from him today :) Anyway... this is the lyrics of the song.
Song: Somebody
Singer: Depeche Mode
It was sung all the way back in 1984, if I am not wrong. Somehow, somewhere, I heard this song long long time ago and liked it. I can still remember very vividly that one of my ECA friends in my JC was very sweet. She knew that my friend and I liked this song, so she went to copy the lyrics of this song very nicely on a piece of paper for us. If my memory has not failed me, I had tucked this piece of paper in my organiser then. I am sure that this piece of paper is still in that organiser, which is, yes, still with me today.
And with a stroke of luck again, one of my colleagues had this song. So I took the song from him today :) Anyway... this is the lyrics of the song.
Song: Somebody
Singer: Depeche Mode
I want somebody to share
Share the rest of my life
Share my innermost thoughts
Know my intimate details
Someone who'll stand by my side
And give me support
And in return
She'll get my support
She will listen to me
When I want to speak
About the world we live in
And life in general
Though my views may be wrong
They may even be perverted
She'll hear me out
And won't easily be converted
To my way of thinking
In fact she'll often disagree
But at the end of it all
She will understand me
I want somebody who cares
For me passionately
With every thought and with every breath
Someone who'll help me see things
In a different light
All the things I detest
I will almost like
I don't want to be tied
To anyone's strings
I'm carefully trying to steer clear of those things
But when I'm asleep
I want somebody
Who will put their arms around me
And kiss me tenderly
Though things like this
Make me sick
In a case like this
I'll get away with it
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
The Power of Sourcing
Do you believe in the power of sourcing? I do. Once you send out your intention or make up your mind, it sets the whole universe into motion, and very little thing responds to that.
Never think that works actually. When I first heard of it, I was like " Huh? What kind of crap theory is that? What source for it !?"
But on hindsight, I realise that I got a lot of results that I have sourced for. Somehow, by stating that intention or having the thoughts, it has driven events to happen, opportunities to come knocking, and thus the results.
I guess the power of intention and sourcing comes when one becomes of one mind and single purpose about a thing, and staying focused and centred till one's will is made into reality. Yet, I realize that sometimes even if it is not intentional, things may just happen in a way that I get to where I want to. Maybe by simply having that thought of intention, I have unknowingly manifested all my actions that lead to the result that I desire.
Got a book " Conversations with God, Book 2" recently and read in the very few first chapters about setting the universe into motion once you make up your mind about something... It is of no coincidence, isn't it? Haha.
However, it also did not take me long to recognize that the power of sourcing is a double-edged sword - if I make up my mind about the negatives, those will be turned into reality as well. So I do figure that I need to tap on the power of sourcing in the 'rite' sense.
"I may have whatever I choose, but may not have anything I want."
This quote was from the book… Get it? *Raised eyebrows* For u to ponder... Haha...
Never think that works actually. When I first heard of it, I was like " Huh? What kind of crap theory is that? What source for it !?"
But on hindsight, I realise that I got a lot of results that I have sourced for. Somehow, by stating that intention or having the thoughts, it has driven events to happen, opportunities to come knocking, and thus the results.
I guess the power of intention and sourcing comes when one becomes of one mind and single purpose about a thing, and staying focused and centred till one's will is made into reality. Yet, I realize that sometimes even if it is not intentional, things may just happen in a way that I get to where I want to. Maybe by simply having that thought of intention, I have unknowingly manifested all my actions that lead to the result that I desire.
Got a book " Conversations with God, Book 2" recently and read in the very few first chapters about setting the universe into motion once you make up your mind about something... It is of no coincidence, isn't it? Haha.
However, it also did not take me long to recognize that the power of sourcing is a double-edged sword - if I make up my mind about the negatives, those will be turned into reality as well. So I do figure that I need to tap on the power of sourcing in the 'rite' sense.
"I may have whatever I choose, but may not have anything I want."
This quote was from the book… Get it? *Raised eyebrows* For u to ponder... Haha...
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Tiring Weekend
My last weekend was just... so tiring. Ended up taking a nap on both aftns. That is rare, by the way, cos I do not attempt to 'waste' my weekend by sleeping, not to mention that I napped for 2 consecutive days! But the funny thing is that I do not think I did much over this weekend. I just went to catch a movie on Sat aftn, did a jog that evening, went to Thomas with another 2 to have roti prata for dinner thereafter, and took a walk at Lower Pierce Reservoir... Maybe the 10km jog on Sat night killed my Sun?!
I was out to swim in late morn on Sun. However, some rotten friends cursed me that I would meet with thunderstorm while swimming. True enough to the curse, the sky turned gloomy 5 min I was in the pool. ?!#*&@*#&*(@ There goes my sun!! I managed to swim only 12 laps before the rain came and I was out of the pool. Caught in the rain, I went to the air-con shopping mall to shop shortly after lunch, and was on the verge of running a fever thereafter. Must be a sign of aging definitely. Haiz. Ended up popping 2 panadols and slept, what else?
I was out to swim in late morn on Sun. However, some rotten friends cursed me that I would meet with thunderstorm while swimming. True enough to the curse, the sky turned gloomy 5 min I was in the pool. ?!#*&@*#&*(@ There goes my sun!! I managed to swim only 12 laps before the rain came and I was out of the pool. Caught in the rain, I went to the air-con shopping mall to shop shortly after lunch, and was on the verge of running a fever thereafter. Must be a sign of aging definitely. Haiz. Ended up popping 2 panadols and slept, what else?
And off track, I caught the movie The Lake House on Sat. It was a sweet, romantic love movie starred by Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock. (Btw, I always like Keanu! :P) However, it may not make sense to some that they were living 2 years apart, and yet the lake house's mailbox managed to connect both of them in their lives. At the end of the whole movie, I could not help but saluted Keanu for his patience to wait 2 years and another 2 years before he got together with Sandra. All the long waiting just for the right moment?! Patience pays off, huh? Hmmm...
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