Today!

I have not been blogging recently... Basically I have been very busy chasing my Korean drama series during my free time at home. =P Other than that, I have been slightly more than stressed over work and some issues with some people… But let’s do all these in another entry… I want to share how my Jul 14 has gone so far today…

I went back to work reluctantly as I had so much unfinished work and I had a meeting in the morning which I needed to attend… Yet I left midday… to go for lunch with Dan. We ended up at Li Bai, Sheraton hotel which Dan had reserved a table. In short, the lunch was fantastic. We ordered the set lunch for two, added the goose liver with peking duck and the spinach tofu. Thumbs up for the food- yummy!! I must also compliment the waitresses’ prompt services – I was certainly impressed by how acute they are to customers’ needs.

The next item on the agenda was a mystery, only realising that I was going for a massage just half an hour before the session. Whichever, both of us had a steam bath, a thorough body scrub and also tui na massage after recommendation by the masseurs. But the best was yet to come for we did this treatment which I forgot what it was called… It was supposed to help get rid of the toxins in your body… and to give you a preview, below are the end results of our backs after our treatment….

I don't think I need to point out whose back is whose, ya? Haha... The damages as you can see are great! All the red little dots that you see especially on Dan’s back are supposed to be evidence where toxins had been sucked out from the body.

Both of our backs are feeling pretty sore now obviously – see how red our backs look!! It was a painful treatment to start off with for Dan was practically holding tight to the legs of the bed when the masseur was doing it to him! Hah! And if my soreness scale is 5 now, then Dan’s one must be x10 of that! :P It will take a lot of courage to try this again!!

What an unforgettable wedding anniversary for both of us! All thanks to Dan! Hah!

P.S. I must thank some sweet guys who have remembered today of ours… Very blessed to have you guys in our lives! :)

寂寞光年-《双子星》主题曲

Really like this song sung by 刘力杨- such powerful voice... Most of all, I love the lyrics... Listen to it and you know what I mean.



是谁从我天空摘走了星星
一转眼 眉头聚满乌云
从来快乐悲伤都自己横行
忘了我也值得被关心

一双手一个梦
一路上不断的俯冲
痛到忘了要怎么喊痛

漫长的寂寞淹没我的难过
我的世界是零下的沙漠
其实我也想要拥抱的温柔
融化这颗坚强的泡沫

漫长的等候让人特别失落
锋锐寂寞把天空都割破
还有谁能够紧握着我的手
陪着我期待消失的彩虹

是谁将阳光都剪成了雨滴
天灰了 快乐总有限期
从来都陷在孤独的流沙里
忘了我也配被人在意
一个人一直走看着梦像做了又空
精疲力尽有没有哪里可以停泊

漫长的寂寞淹没我的难过
我的世界是零下的沙漠
其实我也想有拥抱的温柔
融化这颗坚强的泡沫

漫长的等候让人特别失落
锋锐寂寞把天空都割破
还有谁能够紧握着我的手
陪着我期待消失的彩虹
那是谁的温柔留在我的小手
微不足道却那么重

漫长的寂寞把意志都吞没
整个世界是沉默的漩涡
有谁能陪我手牵着手出走
带我离开空洞的星球

还有什么值得追求
还有什么可以拥有
把怀抱借给我是不是就不再颤抖
有谁能带走这美丽的哀愁
能让我相信被爱的理由

Hope dashed...

The test result is out – he is H1N1 negative… so it is a case closed…

And I cannot get unrecorded leave and stay home to R&R (without being infected of course!)…*snort*

H1N1!

So it is getting nearer...

My company has someone who has been tested positive for H1N1, but luckily he or she is located on another floor.

But my colleague's roommate has just been sent to hospital to test for H1N1 - he is currently running a fever after being back from Philippines last weekend.

My colleague who just sits next to me has been sent home already.

This also means if the test result in another 10 hours' time is positive, I may need to quarantine myself too. :O

Forgetting to live

Like this that I read:

"But those who forget the past, neglect the present and fear for the future have a life that is very brief and troubled; when they have reached the end of it, the poor wretches preceive too late that for such a long while they have been busied in doing nothing."

- Roman philosopher Seneca

Squandering the past:
The engrossed are so caught up in the day-to-day that they never take the time to look back. Their lives are like a bottomless well, swallowing up the past as though it never existed.

Neglecting the present:
"Present time is very brief, so brief indeed, that to some there seems to be none; for it is always in motion."

Fearing the future:
"Very wretched, therefore, and not merely short, must the life of those be who work hard to gain what they must work harder to keep." They spend their entire lives preparing to live.

Raffles Marina

Stepped back into Raffles Marina Yacht Club last Sunday after nearly two years . I love that place for its beautiful sunset and peaceful nightfall. Such coincidence - there was a couple getting married that Sunday evening, and witnessing their solemnisation at the garden lawn brought back nice memories...

The yacht club scene that evening...

Another perspective in landscape

Coconut trees! Hah! The sun started to set

The scenery became more charming as the sun set more

The Mind

The Mind
Relationship with it is a tricky affair
Can it be manipulated?
Can it be conditioned?
Such that it serves purposefully

How not to think?
How not to be bothered?
How not to be affected?

If it is overwhelmed, can it be not?
If it pins for someone, can it let go?
If it feels bitter, can it be sweetened?

To what extent can it be stretched?
So it knows more, be better and exhibits more strength
Is the sky the limit?

What's next?

My new toy

I bought a new Tokina 12-24mm f4 lens few days ago. I was deciding over the weekend what lens I should get for my Canon EOS400D - should I get a zoom len or a wide angle zoom lens. Well, it’s all in preparation for my NZ trip in Oct! :P

After doing lots of read-up, I decided that I should get myself a wide angle lens first. You see, I would love to get every len that I desire but one lens does not come cheap, esp those L lens produced by Canon! (Ok, I know I am speaking Greek now.) Whichever, bottom line there are too many different types of lens, and it is easy to let a new investment end up to be a dust collector.

There are comparables - Canon itself, which costs a bomb of over $1K, and third party lens Sigma and Tamron. In the end, I bought into the salesman recommendation and decided on a Tokina lens. At least the price is better at $840. The reviews have been pretty good for this lens, so I am looking forward to try out my new toy over the weekend. Let's see if it takes some good landscape photos.

Next holidays

Yes! I finally booked my SQ tickets yesterday to Christchurch, NZ in Oct...

Is it too early to book for a trip, especially when no one knows how Swine flu will develop over the next few months? I really don't know, but I am not leaving it to chance again for I have been saying this for the past 2 years, but still have never made it happen. Two years ago, we got play out by our friends, and last year we hesitated on the dates and in a week's time, the airticket prices skyrocketed.

So I figured we all can lock in the dates and the attractive flight fares first -cancellation of the tickets costs S$75 each versus the huge difference in airfares come close to travel dates. All may change come closer to date, but well, at least there is a date for each of us to work towards to. The best part is each of us bought a piece of winter jacket at a sale last week for this NZ trip before we even booked the airtickets! Hah.

Four is a great number to go travelling, so I am indeed excited. We will be spending 2 weeks in NZ, and I'll be spending my birthday there. ;) The broad plan is to comb south of NZ, from Christchurch to Queenstown and back to Christchurch via self drive...

There will be much planning to be done and heaps of stuff to buy for this trip... but I am glad that at least there is a long break that I can look forward to even though it is many months down the road.. :)

Finally a post!

I have been really busy since I was back from Layang Layang two Sunday ago. Work has been never ending that I hardly have time to breathe! I was working from home till past 12mn yesterday!

So no photos, no updates…nor anything else for the past two weeks… (But I ought to say that I had great fun diving at Layang Layang during my 8 days there, not to mention that Dan and I were the few lucky ones to see a school of hammerhead sharks in the deep blue at 40m!)

But finally got a breather and thought to share somethig on a book that I am currently reading -“Listening below the noise” written by Anne D.LeClaire. I must admit it's pretty addictive food for the brain.

I’m not quite done with it, but here is a paragraph that stuck a cord in me:

Within each of us there resides our own muddy, messy space, our inner garbage heap where we toss scarps too painful to consider or confront, the loss, pain, grief, and disappointment that are all too real. In the hollow of our hearts resides the fault lines of our lives, the lies we tell ourselves to get by, and the space where narcissistic aspects of personality can arise. When we weed out extraneous stimulation and let go of the reins of control, these things claim our attention…… “In silence, all the deformed children that dwell inside come forward and say ‘Love me.’” And this is what we flee. Kathleen Norris writes of this…..”Any life lived attentively is disillusioning as it forces us to know as we are.”

Do you resonate with it?

Interesting book, I must say…. More to be read and explored…

Over the long weekend

The long weekend flashed past in a blink, and I wished I had more time. Fun times always seemed to pass the fastest…

Fri, May 1
Dan and I went to explore Marang Trail of the Southern Ridges in the late afternoon, walked through Mount Faber and onto Henderson Bridge once again... I ended up all sweaty in two hours, but still it was a new area to discover and experience. Went for early Mother’s day dinner celebration at a vegetarian restaurant that evening too… It is such a nostalgic restaurant for me as I used to frequent it when I was in secondary school.. Those were the times...

Sat, May 2
I tried beginner rock climbing at SAFRA Yishun at noon time with Dan and another 10+ people. Gosh, what an experience indeed.

See how high the wall is…?

Another angle of the wall.... this is an easy wall... There are other walls behind exhibiting greater challenges!

An attempt up got me panting and sweating- it requires so much strength and effort from me! I know it must be an easy feat for many people who had tried climbing on much tougher walls. Yet, I am proud of my own accomplishment - it was my first try after living for some decades, and I scaled the wall 3x and succeeded on reaching the top each time. But I must admit that I really struggled to stay on the wall on my 3rd attempt, as my energy was already low, and arms were giving way at one crunch point on the wall.

However, I soon forgot the pain that evening as I was eating my frog legs porridge at Geylang ( I had sudden craving for it, you see! Ha!) On top of that, I demanded for durians for snacks that night too! Triple wows for me!! :))

Sun, May 3
As usual, I did my run at East Coast Park with Dan in the morning… It was more than stretchy that morning, as our triceps, biceps and thighs were all aching from the rock climbing the day before. Luckily, the weather started cooling as it was raining before that… but obviously the happiness did not last long as the sun was out to play in no time. Nevertheless, we did about 16km before we cleaned up and made our way to Tampopo for ramen and my favourite tasty eggs! Yummy!

Yet, the best was yet to be! We had a scheduled massage and body scrub to pamper ourselves at 1pm. Shiok is the word after coming out of the room – whole body felt so much more relaxed, smoother, and better before we stepped into the beauty salon. Such sinful indulgence and addiction really…

The day was still young after my massage and we did a whole heap of things and errands thereafter before retiring in bed at 12 midnight…

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been a busy long weekend, yet I felt glad and happy to have such fruitful three days. I had discovered new places, tried new things and enjoyed spending time together, eating good food and doing some activities that I like.

Life is more than just work, stress, getting grumpy about yesterday, and all worried about tomorrow that has yet to come… It is about discovering, experiencing and living the moment. It may not be a simple or easy journey, but the greatest joy can come from simplicity and counting my blessings.

Quote

Someone taught me this last night, and I cannot help but to write about this.

Quote of the day:

"If you know, it is common sense.
If you don't know, it doesn't make sense...."

It does make some sense. *roll eyes*

Swine Flu

The latest is in the air - Swine flu... The virus has very quickly gained much attention worldwide, and has already killed up to 149 people in Mexico.

This new strain of virus spreads from person-to-person and seems to be highly infectious... Adding on to the worries, it seems to kill the young and strong between age 25 to 45 too, and will spread faster than SARS. The WHO has already raised the alert level from phase 3 to 4, indicating a significantly increased risk of a pandemic globally.

So what's next? Will there be an outbreak and and cause chaos like SARS a few years back? It seems too early to tell, but all countries have stepped up their precautionary measures to ward off the outbreak, such as screening all air passengers and quarantining anyone that shows symptoms of the deadly virus.

Obviously, this flu outbreak dampened the already weakened economy even further, as investors feared that it could force the countries further into recession...

Bad news... Many eyes will be focused on the development of swine flu for the next few weeks for sure...

Such powerful individuals

Did a few sms exchanges with my advance sg members who are currently doing LP
Just wanted to see where they are and how they are now
And wow, some are so inspiring and powerful
Some are still trying, but determined and resilient...
They may not know, but they touch me deep from within
Happy to know they are creating results out there
Proud to hear they are not giving up
Delighted to see them playing team for win-win
My contribution to them may be so microscopic,
But being able to witness them grow and soar from a distance is such a privilege
Such inspiring individuals...
This is what life is about – living spectacularly and being in contribution
I am glad that I did make a stand for them...

"Funeral" Commerical ad

The latest commercial commissioned by MCYS... Spend a little while to watch it if you have yet to see it on TV...

"Little imperfections that make them perfect for you..."

Cherish it.

Over last two weeks...

I went missing for awhile without any updates… Simple – I was totally overwhelmed by work awhile back then that I totally had no time or strength to blog.

Long story short, I was so caught up with an offsite event that I was preparing in Hanoi for this weekend. There had been many issues to tackle and areas to look at. Yet, the best is yet to be, for I received a call late last Thu evening from my boss to say that it needs to be postponed… Oh well, what else can I say?

Logically, it’s a blessing for the fact that I have time to breathe this week when it is supposedly to be topsy turvy, and I would need to spend my weekend in Vietnam working. But then again, the whole cycle of nightmare will soon start again once the new dates are out.

I did make a trip to Hanoi over 4 days two weeks ago, and spent some time getting myself familiar there. It was pretty fun overall – it was a whole new experience seeing Vietnamese’s ways of life, tasting their food, walking their streets… The food was pretty yummy ok! We did a day trip to Halong bay too, which supposedly is one of the must-go places in Hanoi. Yet, I think I remembered the torturous 3 and ½h road journey to and fro better than Halong itself!

I also bought a pair of Coleman trekking shoes last week finally, and tried them at Bukit Timah Nature Reserve last Sun. I felt like I was walking in elephants’ feet as the shoes felt so heavy after awhile. Wonder how am I going to climb Kinabalu with the lousy physical state I am in… and we have yet to set any concert date to that climb too… Still trying to find a suitable date - I want to do other holidays too leh! Limited time, unlimited wants!!

Time… always seems to be in scarcity nowadays…*shrug*

Hanoi Highlights

I swinged by to Hanoi for a few days for a business trip two weeks ago, but I did extend another day to explore the area. Such perfect chance, so how to give that up? Some photos below...


View of Hotel Intercontinental Westake from my room. It was a rainy day that day, thus the dark sky. It was only 18 degree outside! Yet, the view was a treat!


The seducing view at nightfall... The serenity is so different from the busy main Hanoi city.


The busy traffic at the intersection of Old Quarter. Traffic is a real nightmare there, not to mention the air and noise pollution!


The entrance to Ngoc Son Temple at Hoan Kiem Lake. You need to pay to get in - VND10k, i.e. S$1.


Oh well, the incense urn outside the temple. Just feel it's a piece of art by itself.


One scenery taken while we were touring the famous Halong Bay.


Isn't this pic arty farty? Taken at Intercontinental again.

Happiness

I like what I read in MyPaper today:

Deaf-blind Amercian author Helen Keller wrote: " Happiness cannot come from without. It must come from within. It is not what we see and touch or that which others do for us which makes us happy; it is that which we think and feel and do, first for the other fellow, and then for ourselves." ...

Today is the tomorrow I worried about yesterday. And today was such a lovely day. That I wondered why I worried about today yesterday. So today I am not going to worry about tomorrow. There may not be a tomorrow anyway. So today I am going to live as if there is no tomorrow. And I am going to forget about yesterday...

Happines does not necessarily have to come from striving for something we don't have. It can come from recognising and appreciating what we do.

Layang Layang

Finally, my first diving trip for the year – Palau Layang Layang from 8 to 15 May! Dubbed "The Jewel of the Borneo Banks", it is supposed to offer an amazing scuba diving experience. Flipping through an old edition of the dive magazine “Australasia ScubaDiver” that reviewed about Layang Layang, I already got all excited simply by just looking at the photos! About 12 world-class sites, each site is as prolific as the next…

April and May is the best time to see schools of scalloped hammerhead sharks – their mating season! Other than that, I may get to see megafauna such as sharks, whales and schools of fish to the coolest macro like pygmy seahorses, leaf scorpionfish and pearly anthias. I must pray very hard that I would get to see all of these and more!

Of course, I’m ready to take heaps of pictures during this trip… n have armed myself with ammunition too – additional 2 camera batteries (on top of the 2 batteries that I already have) and bringing along my laptop to upload all the photos taken daily!

Wow, I cannot wait! Woohooo!

《一切完美2 》主题曲 — 放了爱

你指向远方 爱情很晴朗
笑问不如今后就我们俩
怕泪会反光 钻进你的胸膛
但那不是感动 是 泪无法储藏

把美梦锁上 以为是天堂
羽翼折起在你身边静静躺
却只能用目光在空中翱翔
还得乔装安份 靠在你肩膀

放了爱 为了爱
这不是我 该怎么生活
放了爱

你说你喜欢 我笑得开朗
你越温柔 我越不想撒谎
我已办不到你想要的那样
客气地配合你 我感觉更勉强

别人的幸福 何必要模仿
心不在何苦 留躯壳在身旁
加满自由 我要无重量飞翔
就算以分离收场

放了爱 为了爱
这不是我 该怎么生活
放了爱 会明白
有种拥有 叫做放手

我的心 为爱流离失所
紧握最后回家的线索
等到寻获真正的我
证明我决定没有错

放了爱 为了爱
这不是我 想要的生活
放了爱 你会明白
有种拥有 叫做放手
放了爱

《一切完美2》

Have you been watching Perfect Cut 2 on Channel U at 10pm? I have… When the drama serial “Perfect Cut” was aired in July last year, it broke viewership records, received good critics and won accolades. So Perfect Cut 2 was a sequel to that, featuring the original cast, Thomas Ong, Michelle Chia and Julian Hee, with new blood Edmund Chen and Phyllis Quek.

Personally, I think Perfect Cut 2 is indeed another well done drama serial… The surgeries were so real, making me squeak and hair raised… The storyline of each case was so touching that it drove tears rolling down the cheeks… It brought up controversies of individuals going for cosmetic surgeries and presented different points of views to a same issue, stimulating thoughts and feelings... it is also educational as it sheds lights to some facts and figures that a man-on-the-street may never have known.

On top of that, I love this drama serial for the fact that it has incorporated much life learnings into each episode. Some stuff that I learnt or was reminded again:

• If you can give words of encouragement, why give words of attack? At times, all it takes from you is some words of encouragement to let another person have confidence and go forth in life
• Committing suicide is the greatest humilation to a human being's life
• Relationships are meant to be managed, not tested
• Have the courage to pursue happiness in your life
• Start on a clean slate and make the choice all over again
• Give the key to your heart and see who lives in it
• Every moment spent with loved ones is treasured memory; there is no purpose to time spent into earning money only, sacrificing the time spent with loved ones…

It is the final episode tonight… No prize for guessing that I will be glued to my tv…

My new laptop

Dan and I made up the 768,000 visitors at the IT Show 2009. We were there on Sunday after our weekly morning run, gosh, our jaws dropped when we saw the massive crowd at Suntec Convention Ground Floor waiting to go up the escalators. It was only about 12+pm in the afternoon then and the doors to the IT show were just opened, but it was already packed! It took us more than ten minutes just to go up the escalators lor! Needless to say, we were sardines inside the exhibition hall by 2pm!

Like all others, we were combing for a good bargain there... The purpose was to get a pretty reasonable laptop at an attractive price (read: cheap!). Thus we were wandering around the various PC booths, trying to compare the specifications and prices... Long story short, we stumbled across this HP promotion and we both agreed that this was the ONE! ... HP Pavilion dv4-1301tx Entertainment Notebook PC @ $1,299 (student offer price) with 2nd and 3rd year pick up and return local warranty... Ya ya, of course I am no longer a student, but my younger brother still is... So there we have it! Cheap, good and still got 3 years warranty! I like HP anyway.

Now waiting for it to be delivered in a few weeks time...


• Intel® Centrino® 2 Processor Technology featuring Intel® Core™ 2 Duo Processor P8600 (2.4 GHz, 3MB L2 Cache, 1066MHz FSB)
• Genuine Windows Vista® Home Premium
• NVIDIA GeForce with 512MB of dedicated video memory
• 14.1” Diagonal WXGA HP BrightView Widescreen Display
•4GB RAM
• 320GB HDD with HP ProtectSmart Hard Drive Protection
• LightScribe SuperMulti 8X DVD±RW with Double Layer Support
• 802.11a/g/n WLAN with Bluetooth
• ExpressCard/54 slot (also supports ExpressCard/34)
• Integrated 5-in-1 Digital Media Reader
• HP Pavilion Webcam with Integrated Digital Microphones

The days...

This is one of those days that:
I feel blue and out of sorts
I question my own worth
I doubt my value in others' eyes

There are other days that:
I feel feeble
I want to act wilful and throw tantrums
I feel like running away (or stop running for that matter)

If the journey in life is akin to running, then being disciplined is about completing a run even though I don't feel like it or don't feel like I am up to it...

It's my dream job too!

I am sure you have heard about it - The Best Job in the World, to be Hamilton island caretaker for half a year and get a salary of AUD$150K.

So what do you do in these 6 months? Explore, dive, snorkel, bushwalking, feed the fish, upload photos, videos and blog about your experiences and encounters! All for a handsome salary of $150K! Gosh, how good can that get?!! No wonder people just swamped to try their luck.

This is such an ingenious idea, for the focus is not about hiring a caretaker, but to promote Hamilton as a first-class holiday escapade to the world. It has certainly achieved its purpose! Just looking at the number of applicants, news coverage and the stir it has caused tell more than a thousand words.

The 50 short-listed applicants have just been recently announced, and I was really curious to view their 1-minute videos. I must say, after watching many of them, some of them are really creative, out of the box and well done. My personal favourites are videos from Julia (Russia), Greg (Singapore) and some others which I cannot quite recall now (watched too many, could not recall who is who!).

Take a look at some of the videos: http://www.islandreefjob.com/#/shortlisted-applicants

Dun you wish that you are at Great Barrier reef now, lazing and enjoying what it has to offer? Ahh...

The Card and My thots

When I thought I have rationalised everything
Concluding that it is alright and ok
Only to realise that a card had evoked the obscured feelings
This is one of those times where I overestimate myself
I am sometimes weaker and more vulnerable than I thought

Then again feelings, evaluations, assessments not that I do not have
In fact my conversations may be much louder than many people
But focus on the bigger picture and be rational is what I choose and kept telling myself
Such choices may not make life easier for me
Yet I should do what's best... (or so I hope)
All things happen for a reason - it's a journey for me to accept, learn, shift and grow

... ... ...

Adv: After thots

The five full days were stretchy - I needed to call forth so much focus and energy, not to mention the daily late nights and early mornings. Yet, I simply lost track of time when each day seemed to zoom past in a flash.

It had been a different yet wonderful and fulfilling experience to step back into the Advance training room since my last staffing four years ago. I had grown and shifted over these years, thus the ways I was in the room with my people were completely different. It was a precious growth experience for me, learning that if I am at ease with creating results, my people will be too. I learnt to trust myself in who I need to be for them to win. All the conversations of whether I was doing it right disappeared when I focused out there, on something bigger than myself.

On top of that, I was very inspired by the big people in the room and their willingness to work with themselves. I am proud of the stand they make for themselves and for someone's life. It was of no easy feat, so seeing them shift, let go, grow and create breakthrough make me want to go for more in my life, knowing that I can.

You can never know how an apple tastes like until you get your teeth into it. Similarly, no word can fully describe the experience and learning that you can get in Advance. But I do know it's an experience that no one will regret if they make the decision to walk in. I never did, and I am sure my adv buddy, LP captain, Dan and many people around me can attest to that too... :)

Happy V'day

Today is the day – Feb 14. Where lovers overtly express their love by lavish dinners, gifts and flowers…

What did I do on this day? Spent the first few moments with 2 other friends – it was early celebration of his birthday that falls next Friday… As I am not free next week, we brought it forward to yesterday. We were having a drink together when the clock ticked to 12 midnight.

Today - I ended up at Bukit Timah Nature Reserve for trail walking… I was there for more than an hour in late afternoon, sweating it out from all the climbing and descending… The irony is both Dan and I were tired from that little while of shopping after lunch, but were wide awake when walking around the trails! And we had Mac for dinner cos we wanted to catch the last episode of the 730pm show on Channel U. Oops.. boring day?! Ha…

Do not know when it starts, but I never exactly fancy Feb 14. It is overly commercialized. Maybe it is about age catching up huh. I prefer my way of celebrating V’day, by doing things that I enjoy doing… Simplicity is beauty. Haaa…

Still, Happy Valentine Day, everyone!

I hate next week!

It is going to be super hectic time for me comes next week. Real early mornings plus super late nights for every consecutive day in the week… I wonder how I am supposed to survive the week. * shrug*

It is undoubtedly busy time on Mon and Tue at work… Yet, I am on leave on Wed to Fri… It is seriously a bad time for me to go on leave, as I have much unfinished work and this also means I am delaying some answers that I need from my boss – irritatingly, he is only back in office from Wed. *#Y@*#&! I would need to bear the prices for my actions when I am back at work the week after.

And am I going some place for holidays from next Wed onwards? Nope, it is no fun time. I am in for serious tough work with some people… it will certainly be more intense and tiring than work itself…

Stretchy, stretchy, stretchy… So many prices to pay… It is like I am already in Advance before I step back in again.

I chose this stretch... Arggh....

I hate Mondays, especially today!

It is a 'horrible, horrible' way to start a Monday morning!
Having to crawl out of bed at 5.30am was ultimate torture
Sitting around at 6.45am at hawker centre was a pain
Discussing serious matters at such early hour strained my pea brain
And I am sitting in office now feeling so zombified and tired
That I feel I ought to be shot - death seems to be a better way out for now
Arrgh... it is going to spoil my day... n maybe week...
A tired me is an irritated bitch lor...
All thanks to my captain! 3 cheers for him. Duh.

My first work day in Ox year

Off went the Rat, here comes the Ox… In a blink of an eye, CNY is already on its 3rd day… The preparation for CNY always seems to be mountainous, but the festive season will be over before one realized it.

The indulging super long weekend ended so fast that I was feeling blue going to work today. I regretted not taking another day off – the roads were empty and trains had no crowd. However, most people in my office, being non-locals, were already running at full steam, dampening my CNY mood certainly. Of course, I know very clearly the main reason why I resisted so much about getting into office – the person sitting next to me…

And I did lose my cool with some people in office today. :O I always have little tolerance for nonsensical stuff especially at work, but I have managed (or so I thought) to mellow that down quite a fair bit nowadays. Yet, my mood was biting me so much today that I almost blew off my top! Obviously, my low tolerance could not be hidden nor my irritated tone could go unnoticed. But well, what was done cannot be undone. I just hope I did not start myself on the wrong foot. :(

I would re ground myself of course, me attempting to be the sensible me… So tomorrow will be a better day. *fingers crossed*

“My vision, commitments dictate my actions, not my feelings, assessments or evaluations…”

BUT I should seriously consider if I should take a day off this Friday…

My last clearing in the Year of Rat

When a friend can walk out of you because of that little bit of money, I think it is a little hard to swallow.

Objectively, it is a fair transaction – I pay you the right price, you come and work for me. Some other people pay you a higher price, you move on. There is nothing that I can do or stop it from happening. But the line gets blur when I am talking about a friend here, not to say I am talking only a mere three months here.

When you asked for that price which can compensate you well for your move, I got it for you. When you are in for these few months, you are obviously not as busy as I am, for I think I should give you time to adapt. When you are late or do not come to work, I close one eye...

Yet, after a short stint of three months, you said you want to move back to your ex-company. You said they are going to retain the operation in Singapore instead of the initial plan to shift the team to Bangalore eventually, thus they wanted to hire back people like you who need no training. They have come up with a pay package to match your existing pay, and with that come the $1k London shift allowance, which you think make a huge difference to your income … You have also found a whole string of all other reasons to justify your decision.

I have told myself to draw a clear line between work and friendship. Thus I had not wanted to make you wrong nor want to exploit on feelings… cos I know there will be no end to that. There is also no point getting someone to stay and be unhappy about that. So I had a chat with you very objectively, minus all feelings and assessments, and let you get to where you want to.

But really, it is indeed upsetting if I let all my feelings get to me. As a friend, you had never considered the difficult spot (and the possible shit hole) that you had landed me into by your actions and decision. You have also not appreciated much of the many things that I have done for you here. All you think of is you, yourself and money. So I really wonder what am I to you- a tool that you can make use of and to leverage on?

I do know our vision and thoughts are different, so it is each to his own – there is nothing wrong with your decision. There should be no hard feelings at all, and I don’t think I will have. The issue itself is not a big deal, but it is just tougher to swallow the tints of disappointment in your characters and our friendship...

P.S. Do not exploit me of my trust, love and sincerity... for I can be very vulnerable when it comes to all these.

It's all grim news

World economy now is going downhill, we are in a worst recession after the longest time. What can poor employees like me expect? No job security, no bargaining power... Life is going to be tougher... Better tighten wallet and save more, for I am not as rich as Tan Yong Soon...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reuters - Wednesday, January 21

By Neil Chatterjee and Jan Dahinten

SINGAPORE, Jan 21 - Singapore's economy shrank the most on record in the last quarter of 2008 and the government forecast a 5 percent contraction this year and a possible fall in consumer prices, which may prompt a one-off currency devaluation.

A government declaration that the economy was suffering its worst ever recession and official forecasts of a continued slump suggested to analysts the central bank could push down the centre of the trading band for the Singapore dollar, effectively devaluing it to help the key export sector.

The grim figures, largely a reflection of Singapore's exposure to the slump in global trade, also pave the way for an expansionary budget on Thursday as the government scrambles to shelter the economy from the worst global financial crisis in decades.

"The Singapore economy is going through its sharpest, deepest and most protracted recession," the Trade Ministry's Second Permanent Secretary Ravi Menon told journalists.

Government data showed gross domestic product shrank in the fourth quarter at a deeper-than-expected and seasonally adjusted rate of 16.9 percent, the biggest fall on record and the third consecutive quarterly contraction. Provisional figures had reported a 12.5 percent slump.From a year earlier, gross domestic product fell 3.7 percent.

That left 2008 growth at just 1.2 percent, an abrupt turnaround from a 7.7 percent expansion in 2007 when the stock market <.FTSTI>, financial services and property prices were booming.

The government downgraded its view of the economy for the second time in just three weeks, reflecting the rapid deterioration in the global economy that has seen much of the developed world slip into recession.

Singapore now sees GDP falling between 2 percent and 5 percent this year, which would be the worst performance on record, with consumer prices flat to down 1 percent.

"The official acknowledgement of deflation risks keeps alive a strong possibility that an eventual downward band re-centring could be on the cards in April," said Kit Wei Zheng at Citigroup, adding it could also restore some cost competitiveness.

However, the central bank said on Wednesday its monetary policy stance was intact after it moved to zero appreciation for the currency in October to counter the global financial crisis. It said it had no plans to review policy before a scheduled meeting in April.

Singapore manages monetary policy by adjusting the value of its currency in a secret trade-weighted band.

梁文音【最幸福的事】

How to resist falling in love with this song? I really do not know. Btw, the highlight of this MV is at the end, so be a little patient.

歌詞:

你撐著雨傘 接我那次
已經足夠我 記得一輩子
我懂後來你 不是不堅持
愛情本來就 沒萬無一失
淚水離開了 你的手指
那不如讓它 留在這信紙
我想女孩子 最貼心的是
讓愛的人選 結束的方式

我最幸福的事 當過你的天使
趁鼻酸能掩飾 讓我們像當時擁抱最後一次
最幸福的事 吹蠟燭時你總為我許願的手勢
為摯愛的人 在左邊心口保留位是最幸福的事

可惜愛不是 童話故事
不能夠永遠 依賴著王子
再難過其實 隻剩兩個字
我怎麼忍心 為難你解釋

我最幸福的事 當過你的天使
趁鼻酸能掩飾 讓我們像當時 擁抱最後一次
最幸福的事 吹蠟燭時你總為我許願的手勢
為摯愛的人 在左邊心口保留位置 是最幸福的事

那一陣子有你 美得不像現實
多高興每一幕 都微笑著靜止

我最幸福的事 牽著你的日子一段愛
從開始 即使分開我們 都對彼此誠實
最幸福的事 對那片海用力大喊永遠的樣子
想得起那時 那天和你傻笑著認識 是最幸福的事

Mary Jane!

This is my newly bought pair of Mary Jane Crocs... after a failed attempt to buy my running shoes (yet again!) at Queensway.

There is a 30% discount, so I think it is a great buy to replace my green Athens Crocs.

I'm easily satisfied, so am happy with this great buy! I got the cutie studs too (at a discount too, of course!)... Haaa...

I must say Crocs are really comfy walking shoes! Never judge slippers/shoes by their appearances...

Oh Women...!

We have more and more women joining our team in our office in these recent weeks
And one of my colleagues shares the same sentiments as I do -
It's worrying cos we know how some women can complicate things, not to say they cat fight
There are thousand and one things women compare amongst themselves
Looks, figure, age, status, dressing, make-up, bags, shoes... the list can go on and on
Some women obviously can be very threatened by younger, prettier and more energetic newbies
Some others resist that there is another woman more powerful, more assertive in the same room as they are
Some just cannot stand the fact that they are no longer the centre of attention
So they resort to stunts of all sorts to get to where they want to be...
Conversations such as "she is a bitch", "she did this, she did that” and “like and dun like" blah blah blah start to storm the grapevine...
Women can be worst creatures on earth when they start to get insecure
These undercurrents are worse than chemical warfare itself

At the end of it all, I think it eventually boils down to self confidence - knowing who you are, where you stand in terms of your own beauty and capabilities
We all are unique individuals with different personalities, looks and strengths, appealing to different people and excelling in different areas
Embracing fully who we are will make us shine brightly amongst the crowds...
Yes, it's easier said than done...
And ... I am also a woman...

My 2009 Declarations

Decide to do these few in 2009:
A marathon, a climb and a few dive trips;
Staff an advance, aim for greater heights at work, and spend more times with loved ones...

To be:
Be open, loving, passionate, focused and determined...

Simple? Yes??? (You sure?!)

Period.

What a first week

Last week was only the first week officially into the New Year at work, but it had already presented a fair share of challenges to me, driving me almost nuts…

I wonder how all can develop over the months and where I will be by then. Some things, there aren't instant solutions; for others, the situations do not seem to happen in my favour.

Is it a bad omen for the year? Or maybe I am over worrying, for things will all fall in place eventually…

Whichever, I definitely will not sit around and wait for the sky to drop or the hare to run and bang its head in front of me. At times like these, it is always wise to be constantly on my toes.

Let's wait and see… Bless me.

My 2008

A late post, but I did do my review and reflection of 2008. On hindsight, the year did not seem bad afterall - it is always a blessing to have all things to work out eventually, isn't it?

Work had been very challenging as I struggled my way through… There were countless moments when I sat at my desk and pondered hard over what was the appropriate next step. And my bonus sucked big time as compared to others when I got my adjustment letter in Nov. But it was all rectified when my boss gave a pretty good pay increment thereafter.

Relationships with family hasn't been easy - heaps of effort to get them handled, and they drove me nuts very often. Fortunately, there wasn't any big issue that could not be resolved, and together with the support from Dan, so I should not be complaining.

I did 2 marathons in 2008, which is the first time…and after 3 years from my first full marathon attempt in 2005. There were improvements in each run, which was something for me to celebrate about. Running - it is about ability and determination to finish a run even though I am not built for it and I am less than half past six at it. My learning and results from running are used to support all other areas in my life when I face crunch times.

I did 3 a-week long diving trips in the year too. Diving opens up a different world and experience… It is awesome to see so many remarkable living things in the sea. Besides, it is amazing how one's mind will never be on anything else (like work or dinner!) underwater…

All being said, I wish for a better and smoother year in 2009…

Anilao: 7 to 14 Dec

Finally, my pc is back! So now I can upload some photos from my recent Anilao trip! :)

Below is Portulano. Other than this resort, you can't find other shops or resorts on this part of island where it is accessible. BUT the 3 of us practically had exclusive use of the resort for 5 days out of the 8 days! We even had massage on the sun deck under the bright full moon and starry night! Enjoyment!

Well, 2 mad men taking photos of each other at the jetty... And of course, another insane woman stole a shot of the 2 of them! :O

Some diving highlights... Below is porcelain crab...

Stonefish - never realise that they have such colourful fins!

Such colourful fire urchin. They are prevalent in sites that are polluted.

We were fortunate to stumble across this giant Triton! It is the enemy of urchins, for it eats them! Triton certainly helps to keep the corals alive.

Saw the crab? It was only about 2cm. I had a hard time trying to capture a good shot of it as it was so tiny and its movements were so fast! Have yet to find out its name though.

Psst... This is R-rated! This pair of nudibranches are in the midst of making love!!

Another colourful nudibranch...

Here is a cute one!

Merry Christmas!

X'mas is just less than 2 days away and everyone seems to be on a last minute shopping frenzy trying to get the long X'mas gift list all tick off. Seriously, I do not think I am much better in that for I never have an easy time with pressies. It is tough to get something that I think the intended recipient will like ( that is within my budget!). It is more like throwing darts and see if I manage to hit the bull eye or miss it totally.. Arrgh...

Do I have a wild and hectic party plan around X'mas? The answer is no… Somehow I have outgrown that and will prefer quieter get togethers… Call me attitude… old… or spoilt sport… But one cannot expect my likings or activities to remain the same after all these years…

Still, X'mas is my favourite festive season. There are so many activities revolving around this day, and the whole town seems alive! Such contagious mood. More importanly, I like the idea of sharing and caring behind this day.

Merry X'mas, folks! Have a great fun time out there!

These 2 weeks

I went MIA for awhile… the reasons were many:

1 . My CPU at home went up in a smoke literally 2 weeks ago, tripping the whole electricity circuit in the house. Still waiting for repair options, so there is no pc for use at home for the time being.

2. I was busy packing my luggage for my Philippines trip, handling my kittens and doing last minute practises for the Standard Chartered Marathon.

3. I was away in Anilao to eat, sleep and dive for the whole of last week.

4. Was back in office more than half dead yesterday after landing in Singapore very late night on Sun, and was rushing to get everything in order for the evening X'mas party at Dempsey Hill.

Will try do more updates on my marathon and Anilao trip if I get the chance… Otherwise, they should remain as pure memories. Haaa...

Nitrox Certified

I took my Nitrox test yesterday evening. It was only 25 MCQ and it was easy. I took less than 20mins to finish the questions and scored 100%. If only I knew earlier, I would not have tried so hard trying to study that stupid book - it was super duper boring!

Now that I got my Enriched Air Diver Specialty certification, I am all geared up for my Philippines diving trip from Dec 7 to 14… :-D :-) ;-P

Anilao, here I come! Sea creatures, wait for me!

Sick week

I was sick most of the time last week somehow. It started on a Tue, and it came and went for the following few days. The worst hit was Friday, where I had diarrhoea for 6x in the morning before I took pills to stop it. I had a very bad hit of stomach cramp spasms thereafter in the evening where I almost went berserk in office. And the irony was that I had seen a doctor just an hour before that, and the doctor was still saying that I looked well and should be on my way to recovery for my stomach flu! :O Cancelled everything that I planned to do on a Fri evening, I headed home with some assistance.

I was running a fever too as I laid on bed that night, but it was indeed a relief to be back home resting. I slept and slept that night, waking up every now and then. I was supposed to attend a friend’s church wedding on Sat afternoon, but yes, I skipped that as well… My body was too weak after fighting the whole night, and the weather outside was too hot for someone like me to be out there…

Good news is I should have recovered… cos I had resumed my run (but a short one) last evening…

What's next?

When results do not match up to expectations
What’s next?

When actions do not tally with words
What’s next?

When words do not reflect innermost feelings and emotions
What’s next?

When the heart is loggerhead with the brain
What’s next?

Is there a best way?

It has been a year

I was officially 1 year old in my company on 4 Nov. What an achievement for someone like me! Hah. It had been a fruitful one year – many things to learn, adapt and handle.

It wasn’t exactly an easy journey in this company but I supposed I should not be complaining too much. It is so much better than my previous experience, for at least there isn’t that much politicking here that drives me up the wall, and there are enough challenges to keep me constantly on my toes and set me thinking more.

Of course the future is unknown – how long and far in this company, I do not know. But for the time being, I figure I just need to keep going, and the future will unravel by itself… hopefully in a positive way.

A Night of Loss

Saturday, 8 Nov:

It was the longest struggle to get myself to sleep. As the minutes and hours ticked by, I laid on my big and comfy bed wondering why I was still wide awake...

12.30am:

I was on bed, ready to sleep. It was a stuffy night but I refused to on the air con, thinking that I would not wake up if I make it too conducive for sleeping… I was supposed to wake up at 645am that early morning to go for my run at East Coast Park…

2.30am:

For some reasons, I was still awake. I looked at my clock and started to panic - I had only 4 hours before I needed to wake up. Was it the iced lemon tea I had earlier with my Mac meal, I thought to myself. I tossed and turned… visited the toilet for the umpteen times and decided to on the radio, the soothing music might rock me into lullaby.

3.30am:

WTF, how came I am still alive?! All methods seemed to fail… n the harder I tried to sleep, the more it eludes me! My mind raced through all alternatives and was bombarded with all random thoughts.

4.06am:

Smsed my friend to cancel the run in the morning, for I was sure I would be more than half dead at 6.45am. I was totally pissed with myself!

4.30am:

Oh yes, oh yes… I think you got the idea…

And I did drift into sleep eventually, thought dunno what time... I woke up at 9am in the morning, feeling totally drained… So I did no morning run, ended up having lunch and doing shopping with my friend who had bunked at my house on Sat… But there was obviously a price to pay – I took a nap in the afternoon to get my energy back, and ended rescheduling other things to fit in a shorter run of 10km in the evening...

NO MORE seah.

Horrible Experience

Someone just reminded me that I could not longer wise up as I did a wisdom tooth extraction recently. What he does not know is that I JUST did another extraction yesterday! It was surgery to remove the impacted bottom right wisdom tooth. After procrastinating for about 7 years, I finally picked up my courage to have the other impacted wisdom tooth removed.

It was a horrifying experience when I had my first wisdom tooth removed. I was always having toothache during exam period due to stress in my University days. I eventually bit the bullet to remove that particular one when I started work… I still can remember vividly how the 2 nurses pressed on each of my shoulders to keep me down while the male dentist struggled to have my stubborn tooth removed, the trauma, pain… and the tears that rolled down after the anesthetic wore off… thus I never dared to go and remove the other impacted tooth…

However, my right jaw gave me problems while I was diving at Manado. I thought it must be the decayed wisdom tooth causing the intolerable pain at the jaws that even painkillers could not keep it away… After checking, the ENT specialist said it was due to the inability of clearing my ears, thus causing the bleeding of the nose.

Then again, I thought it should be high time that I get rid of this troublesome tooth which is always trapping food and causing headache. So I fixed up an appointment more than a month again… and I had it removed yesterday. I must be a real coward for I regretted my action as I sat on the dental chair… I tensed up when I felt pain while the dentist was drilling apart my tooth even though she had given jabs of anesthetic, and I squirmed in silence when I could feel how hard she tried to dislodge my remaining root…

All was done now though after the long 1 n 1/2 hours of trauma at the dentist. I am now on antibiotics and 2 types of painkillers… and I realized that it is awfully painful without the more potent painkillers... Just tested it and I am feeling the pain as I am writing now... Oh yes, my pocket is badly burnt too - a total cost of $905!

BUT I am on a straight 5 days of medical leave… so that is something to celebrate – at least no work for this week! And I do NOT have a single wisdom tooth left, so do not blame me if I appear to be really stupid!

Another HK trip...

I was at Hong Kong last Fri to Sun… The purpose? For the Bledisloe Cup – All Blacks against Wallabies battle of Rugby happening on Sat, 1 Nov… It was a working trip – we had great dealing with this game, and our Hong Kong office had planned corporate hospitality programs around this game since last Wed till game day on Sat…

With Helen’s wedding on Thu, I could only fly down on Fri to attend the evening cocktail function… It was Halloween that day of course, and I realized that Hongkies celebrate this day big time! You could only see mountains of people trying to get their way into Lan Kwai Fong from 9pm! Gosh! I ended up with colleagues in a pub at Shaunton road after the cocktail event, and later pub hopped to Wan Chai. I nearly got myself into trouble with different Ang Mos – they must be thinking I am an easy target or something? Darn!!

Yes, yes it was THE match on Sat @ Hong Kong Stadium, 4.30pm… The stadium was nearly packed full with 39 000+ people… How was the rugby? Well… the game was not live as it is NZ All Blacks to retain the trophy. Yet, you could see all enthusiastic fans (mostly ang mos) cheering for their team. The mood was simply contagious. Both teams put up a good fight as well, especially 2nd half of the game.

I had a great time thereafter too as I got the chance to meet up with my colleague who was just relocated there. He treated me to the famous curry pork chop rice and a cup of iced coffee at Pacific Coffee. I toured his new place of residence thereafter, and his place made me drool with envy- so darn nice especially with facilites such as rooftop open space, cosy lounge area and spectacular views! However, I made no way down to the pub that night though I had agreed to as I was getting way too lazy after getting back to hotel.

It was totally R&R day on Sunday – I had breakfast in the room, took a walk down the harbour and shopped around Mong Kok before taking the 6.30pm flight back to Singapore…

Not a trip that I wanted to go initially, but it was my boss who wanted me to be there… So there I was, and it was more like an R&R trip for me. Did not know how to exactly describe this trip – too much mixed feelings on what I saw and experienced… But I do know that it certainly added to my pool of experience… I should be more wised up next time round... hopefully…

Wedding on 30th Oct

It was a tiring affair to drag myself up at early hour of 5am to get myself prepared before heading off to Helen’s house to prepare for gate crashing… It didn’t help when I slept barely 4 hours, as I was busy packing my barangs to go over to hotel immediately after the morning session and as well as for my Friday’s Hong Kong trip. But soon all was forgotten – I only remembered to sabotage the guys and kept asking for ang pows. Haa..

It was customary wedding in the morning and a simple catholic wedding thereafter. The sisters had to walk the aisle too after the page boy and flower girl in church! Where she got that idea from?! :-O *innocent look*

The night was at Regent Hotel. I was overwhelmed with emotions when I saw the montage, not to mention when the couple did the walk in… Helen is such a dear friend to me all these years, and I am both touched and delighted to be there witnessing such an important moment of hers. And yes, the evening just passed at a wink of an eye… So many months of hard work for a day… Haaa…

Oh yes, I forget to add that I was the star of the morning video montage – you can practically see a lot of close up shots of me, the notorious bitch in action! What a disgrace!

Wedding bells are near

In another two days, it will be my long time pal’s wedding! Helen was my primary school mate, and our friendship goes back the longest in history. I’m certainly happy for her that she has found her lifelong partner and is finally settling down. Equally, I’m delighted that I can contribute that little bit to her wedding.

I can’t wait for her day to come – I’m sure she will be one pretty bride, and I already can imagine her walking down the aisle in church!

Congratulations, dear friend! It is an indescribable feeling to be able to have the chance to witness you getting married. It seems only like yesterday two ignorant brats were in school playing or when we were working part-time job together after our ‘O’ levels! Gosh!

Marriage is a lifetime commitment, and I sincerely wish the both of you eternal happiness and joy… The journey is going to begin – have fun! :)

“Running & Philosophy”

“Running & Philosophy” by Michael W. Austin was a book that I picked up sometime back after I stumbled across it accidently at MPH. As the title implies, it is a book that ties running with philosophy together, exerting that they have a lot in common. And yes, I was impressed by the way Michael puts across some of his ideas… Definitely not an easy book to read, and I have still a long way from finishing this book, but what’s new? Ha…

Here is one small extract about life must be lived as play from this 200+ odd pages of book:

“Most runners don’t run to lose weight or get fit, they run because they enjoy it. It becomes a huge part of their life, of who they are. It was only in running that George Sheehan felt “whole and true and living at the peak of my being”. And such moments of peak contentment are usually times of “absorbedness.”

People are absorbed when they are totally into what they are doing, totally engrossed in the present task and the present moment. Feeling of contentment that often accompanies moments of absorbedness illustrates a fundamental insight about happiness that philosophers call “the hedonistic paradox”. The paradox is this: usually the happiest people are not those who pursue happiness directly, who make happiness their goal. Rather, the happiest people tend to be those who experience happiness as a by-product of other things they value and enjoy, such as loving relationships and engaging in challenging and rewarding work.

Runners understand the hedonistic paradox because they live it daily. They find happiness through sweat, sacrifice, and struggle. To most non-runners this is a complete enigma. Cars pass a lonely runner on a solitary road – lungs burning, knees aching – and the passengers shake their heads. Why anyone would want to do that, they wonder. The runner, in turn, barely notices the car. For her, reality is this road, this moment, this feeling. Soon she will be back in the world of deadlines, piano practices, and endless loads of laundry. But for the moment there is nothing but his road, this feeling of wholeness, the Zen-like effortless effort. For her, journey and destination have fused. Success is now."

《King and I》

King and I is the latest korean drama series that I am watching recently. 3 sets of DVDs, a total of 63 episodes, costing more than $100 for the full set! :O Nonetheless, it is still an interesting drama, of cos!

All about eunuchs - in fact the focus is on them, king and women (hopeless!), power, the darkness of politics and the struggle... Ya, I know - I'm turning into a Korean drama addict.

Old and older

I hit the big 3 two days ago… A few of my girlfriends who had crossed that hurdle much earlier this year were curious how I felt on that day for they were pretty much depressed and grouchy on their own birthdays as it signifies that they are no longer young; that youth has zoomed past them without they achieving much. Well, I hate to disappoint, but I chose to view it differently - I celebrated the fact that I am in another phase of my life, that it is only going to get better, more exciting and enriching…

I could be indulging in self misery for I caught flu somehow, with a bad throat, throbbing headache and occasional running nose since Sun afternoon… But my mood shouldn’t be dampened just over this, isn’t it? Thus, on Sunday evening I visited the Night Safari for the first time, and on Monday afternoon ice skating - an activity that I had not done for ages!

Ya, I admit that I am a mountain turtle for I had never been to Night Safari all these years, but now I had… and I enjoyed the fun and experience… I had butterflies in my stomach when I stepped into the skating rink after about 8 long years. I struggled for my balance as I moved inches forward awkwardly, and I feared for my bones if I did fall. But, just like any other new activities, we learn by experiencing and get better by practicing. At the end of 2 hours, I was more relaxed and had some little fun with all those young kids… Haaa… What a way to signify new experiences for me! Of course, none was possible without Dan. So I thank him for going the extra mile to make my day.

The 1st person to wish me Happy Birthday via sms on my actual day was someone once very important in my life. I had picked up heaps from him– his wits, creativity and confidence during our growing up years. He is a day older than I am, so I figured there is no way that I can ever forget his birthday...

Of course, I had some jolly good friends who took effort and spent money to buy me pressies and/or made the time to have dinners or lunches with me. There were many others too who sent through their good wishes via phone calls, smses or emails. On this very day of my birthday, I know I am blessed to be surrounded by so many people who love me for who I am...

Another phase of life for me… Let it be forward moving, purposeful and meaningful… I am and will be sourcing for that.

ECP run...

We did another evening run at East Coast Park last night. There is supposedly to be quadthalon happening at ECP this morning, hence we decide to alter our Sun morning ECP run…

All I can say is it was totally exasperating that we caught on the rain last night again! It turned out to be a race against the rain. The sky was already showing signs of possible rain when we started, but I thought we couldn’t be so down on our luck once again. But I was too early in my conclusion for we felt small raindrops after our mid-point U turn. We picked up our pace for we certainly did not have the desire to end up like the last time where it was a storm and we were stranded for an hour.

The drizzle got bigger as we pressed on, forcing us to go faster; yet, my mind and body did not seem to be in sync. I struggled to the end point, with my lungs grasping for air and legs giving way. What a complete torture.

Heaven loves to make sport of people certainly, for the rain completely went into hiding after my bath… Thanks mate… DUH. No more evening run at ECP for me anymore!

Dark Clouds...

As more unravels, the bigger the mess the entire financial market seems to be in… No one knows how deep and widespread the trouble can go further, neither can anyone identify the solution to it… Dark clouds loom the whole industry. *Sigh*

Some friends of mine had caught on the heat – they have been slogging till wee hours for the past two weeks and presumably in the next few weeks too. It must have been a complete nightmare for them, as issues are mountainous and the end seems nowhere near… I can certainly feel their built-up stress…

Certainly not an easy time for many of us… Hope the dark clouds will soon pass, and the sun will be shining once more. Preserve on, my dear friends.

F1 First Night Race

The Singapore Formula One Grand Prix was an absolutely exciting one. The experience of watching the race up close beat watching it on TV or anywhere else. The onsite mood was fantastic, with real time actions, deafening sounds and unexplainable trills!

It was a drama-filled race yesterday with Ferrari’s Massa started from pole but a disastrous mistake at the pit stop sent our jaws dropping – he drove off with the fuel hose still attached to his car!! Although the crew eventually managed to pull off the hose at the end of the pit lane, all was too late. Adding on to that, he was given a 10 seconds drive through penalty. He only managed to finish 15th in place.

The highlight was Spain’s Fernando Alonso, the two-time world champion, as he won the first race in a year. The Renault driver started from 15th as his car ran into mechanical problems on Sat qualifying session. However, in the mayhem of pit lane dramas, crashes and safety cars, Alonso took the lead at Lap 34, and finished first. Germany’s Nico Rosberg finished second, with championship leader Lewis Hamilton in third…

I certainly had great fun there last night – no, I wasn't in the exclusive (and costly) Paddock or in any other suite, I was only at Connaught Grandstand, but it's a brand new experience which beats seeing the race on TV or hearing it a hundred times from someone! :)

Memories...

It was past midnight when I heard this song by Michael Jackson in the car today. I could not help but to bring myself back to nearly five years ago, when we decided to use this song “Heal the World” as a torch pass song. I remembered walking into the packed room with lit candles with my mates singing this song, reaching out and touching hearts. Our message to the people in the room - make the world a better place to live in. I also have vivid memories of holding the torch and passing it on.

Time has flied certainly. It seemed only like yesterday when it happened. Nevertheless, it was a marked turning point for me then… If not then, I would not be where I am today. So am I glad that I went through it? Yes, of course.

And such coincidence today is my captain’s birthday too!! It has been 5 years… but I do remember that he was the one who rooted for me when I went for my interview presentation. I was getting really nervous and it was his sms that gave me confidence. I could also recall that I was feeling very disappointed with myself in a job, and he was there to give me strength…

We just had steamboat buffet dinner together… and hope he would like the watch… Happy birthday.

Bad news

First, it was Lehman Brothers filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, followed by a last attempted deal to sell off its Asia business to Barclays.

Then, there was Merrill Lynch absorbing more than US$40 billion in write-downs and its rescue buyout by Bank of America.

Then it was the giant AIG asking for a loan, which US Fed Reserve is close to finalizing a US$85 billion loan in exchange for a nearly 80% stake in the company.

British bank HBOS, which is Britain’s biggest provider of home loans, is in deep trouble on the stock markets amid the crisis engulfing global financial markets, and it is reported that Lloyds TSB is in talks to buy it over.

And there is speculation whether Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley are the next on the line.

The whole financial market is in turmoil. Where is the end? It is yet to be known, but it clearly spells trouble. Any job in the financial sector can be very unstable – I had witnessed it first hand already. Better to be on the toes now and don’t assume own indispensability or job security.

May I be blessed.

Full Moon

Have you taken a peek outside your window tonight? Isn’t the moon exceptionally beautiful today? It’s mid- autumn festival today – a day that Houyi visits his wife, Chang-e accordingly to a myth, thus it is tonight that the moon is full and beautiful.

Since sometime back, I never fail to admire the beauty of the full moon, no matter where I am… and every time, the moon leaves me in awe of her charms – sexy at times, pretty at times, captivating in other times. She always seems so near, but I know she is beyond my reach, meant to be only appreciated from far… But perhaps that is how it is supposed to be. Getting too near will mask the intriguing beauty and upset the whole equilibrium…

Still loving it nonetheless.

My Fri

I was supposed to be out shopping, and then I was supposed to be out celebrating a friend’s birthday over dinner on Friday evening. It was long awaited Friday, and it was a time to let down the hair and had some fun out there. But I turned down everything at last hour.

I ended up getting home before 7pm. After settling down, I did a simple dinner to fill my stomach and poured myself a glass of white wine to go along, while watching my DVD. The week proved to be a little more than I could take, and somehow it had reached a tipping point on such a Friday. I decided that I needed the time away from the bustling crowd, let my emotions clear a little and had some quiet time for myself. I did not think I would do quite well if I were out trying to make merry and entertain my friends. By the way, I really had no patience to wait for 2+hours before meeting my friends that day.

And yes, I did feel better thereafter. Somehow, the emotions found their own space and settled down better… Afterall, I was given enough space – I had the whole house to myself for that few hours before bedtime. :P

Korean Drama Addict

Did I say that I am watching another Korean drama recently? I had been watching it for the past 5 weeks already!

I watch a few episodes every day, day in, day out, and the weeks just fly past! We are talking a total of 167 episodes, not mentioning that I started off from Episode 43 instead of the first… But I finally got to the last episode last weekend! Oh, I should also say that I have just started from the very first episode today too. :-P

My ex-staff got the DVD for me on his last day. I asked him causally before if he got them at home since his mom and sisters were Korean OST addicts. This OST was showing in Channel U at 7pm everyday, and it aroused my interests when I caught a few episodes during days that I was back home real early from work. Certain dialogues and acts were really hilarious, you see…

It is a simple (and light hearted in some sense) drama series – it features the love, struggles and triumphs of a nineteen years old girl whom initially came to Seoul to get married, how sincerity can move all the people around her, and the dailies of two families including the disputes, arguments and the intense love, care and concern.

There aren’t big ups and downs or extremely drama stuff in this OST, yet it is so heartwarming that one will inevitably be very touched by all the simple acts and displays of deep affection and love.

Simplicity is beauty; sincerity and perseverance pay off; bliss is doing what you love doing with the support of your loved ones… these are my learnings from this 《19岁的纯情》.

Thots

Sometimes the journey just isn’t as smooth as I want it to be
When I thought it can go a little more stable
Life would just has its way of springing up surprises (or shocks) for me
Jerking me out of my daydream, throwing me off my chair, leaving me bewildered and lost
I hate to get complacent or comfy – that usually spells trouble for me as proven many a time
I'd rather be on my toes so that I am always prepared for the unexpected
There are always times I wonder why so…
Why me, why must it happen, why is it tougher for me than for others...
Unlimited questions of whys
Yet, I learn to tell myself that things happen for a reason…
For me to learn, to grow, to make a better me in the future
I need to view every incident and experience in a more positive light
Yet the process is not easy – it doesn’t happen with a snap of my fingers
Perseverance will get me to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I understand fully
I just need to hang on…
And trust that things will eventually fall in place for me, as it always did…
Faith, stay here with me.

What a run!

This was my run at ECP yesterday night...

650pm: Started running after Fort road, after all the blocked roads in preparation for Ironman on Sunday. Ran like a snake, trying to run through all the people. Everyone seemed to be there; the air only smelt of BBQ food.

800pm: U-turn at National Sailing Centre.

805pm: Gushing strong wind, dark red sky... The weather not looking good! Couldn't even quite run in one straight line due to the strong wind! Is Tsumani coming, I thought to myself... We started to double up our running pace while muttering to the sky to wait till we were back at the start point.

840pm: Stopped for a break and a can of Pocari at the toilet. Shit, the sky din wait for us -it was raining cats and dogs within 2 mins. But we were just about 3km from end point! &#*@! Toilet shelter area started to get really crowded with all the people trying to squeeze for a space to avoid the rain.

930pm: Too long a wait, legs giving way already and getting very impatient. Rain finally seemed to be smaller. Decided to run back in the rain. After all, we did not have a choice – the car was at Fort road carpark!

930pm onwards: Gosh, legs were stiff like sticks after stopping for about an hour. The road was wet and slippery, and the wind was icy cold! Couldn't see properly with my glasses – it was coated with rain drops! Yet, the only way out was through, so gotta keep running. Otherwise, it would only take forever to reach my destination.

940pm: Ran through the Big Splash carpark and ran on the road side towards Fort road carparo as we wanted to avoid crawling through the muddy water-filled grass patches due to partthereof pavement blocked for the Ironman event. All the cars that passed by us then must be thinking we are seow!

10pm: Cleaned up, bathed, make nice.

1030pm: Finally dinner time at KFC… Such sinful stuff at late night, but could we care more than just to satisfy the growling stomaches? By the way, the rain didn't stop even at 11pm. In fact, it was only bigger! :-O

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130am: Bedtime!

Learnings

I have learned.

Learnt to view the world with a different set of lens that is serving
Learnt to open up my heart to listen and receive
Learnt to be thankful who and what are in my life
Learnt to understand, accept and love myself
Learnt to stretch beyond for spectacular results
Learnt to take different actions to create different result
Learnt to let it out and let it go
Learnt to make a stand and make a difference
Learnt to understand life and appreciate it
Mostly importantly, learnt to learn and re learn continuously.

I'm still in the process of learning, as ever.